One of the most enduring principles of Filipino culture is adherence to authority. One gives respect to Filipino elders by showing obedience and recognition of their seniority. This can be done through the mano po, where one's forehead touches the back hand of a senior member of the community. Another more common act is using the word po in a sentence to show one's acknowledgement of the other's seniority or authority. For example, if my mom asked me a question, I would respond by saying yes po or no po in accordance with the dictates of Filipino rules on authority. The same goes for responding to a person of higher authority, perhaps a boss, with the word po to delineate a clear division of authority..one being subservient to the other.
Many expatriates feel uncomfortable with the response of po so Filipino culture has altered the po to Sir or Ma'am. Showing respect is a matter of etiquette. However, many Filipinos tend to use it excessively to a point where Sir or Ma'am is interjected in a sentence once, twice, or three times. Take into consideration, the following dialogue I heard in the office today: "If I may say so sir, I think that would be a bad idea because we do not have the capacity to handle it sir, but thank you for your time, sir."
Growing up in the United States, I was never obligated to give mano po, say po after every sentence. All of my thoughts, ideas, actions were done so freely. Having that same mentality here is difficult because while some may see my pro-active actions as admirable, many see it as a threat to the social pecking order, an attempt to undermine positions, a blatant usurpation of roles. So how am I suppose to find the balance necessary to show my ambitious and pro-active spirit when I constantly encounter people who see it as a threat rather than an advantage.
When dealing with professors, managers, bosses, colleagues, strangers there is always a feeling of intimidation and awe. However, the atmosphere of interaction I've experienced in the U.S. has always encouraged equality amongst individuals. Views were challenged regardless of position, ideas were exchanged without feelings of offense, and actions that show determination, independence, and ambition were admired and recognized.
In the Philippines, however, such approaches are treated with caution. To many here, a pecking order exists and one shows absolute respect to someone with a higher status (identified by education, experience, or professional title) by acknowledging obedience in manner. If you are a janitor, your sole job is to wipe tables and you will do that for the rest of your life unless someone says otherwise. If you start to arrange the feng shui of a room and show an interest in interior designing, it is possible that you will get reprimanded for stepping out of the assigned job role instead of receiving recognition for such innovation.
I had a recent altercation with a senior member of the office who thought I had overstepped the boundaries of this "pecking order" by suggesting I was giving orders when in fact I simply wrote a common statement. Was a public exertion of his authority really needed? No. Was my intent to test his authority? No.
Regardless, it was something I am not use to and still getting use to. With many of my expat managers in the office, I can freely give my opinion, advice, thoughts, and ideas without fear of their sensitivity and offense of disturbing the "pecking order" .. In fact, today my office manager asked for my opinion on how to make certain office operations better. He did so because he simply saw me as an equal and there were no barriers of education, experience, or professional title between us.
That is the interaction I am use to. That is the interaction that my professors instilled in me for four years. That is something many Filipinos have difficulty getting use to when working in international organizations. However, as the American working under Filipinos it is difficult to tolerate the condescension many senior officers display. Pecking Order up your ass! But alas, sensitivity and understanding in a different culture is an important aspect of growing up.
It is unbelievably difficult to deal with people like that. However, as most things are in the walk of life one must deal with such challenges with open eyes and PATIENCE. People like that will come and go and regardless of position and status, one must constantly strive to work hard and command respect in the fact of insurmountable B.S.
I believe professionalism cannot be taught, it must be learned. This is one aspect of learning, learning your boundaries of self control and focusing it on ways to pave the way for your success regardless of what people may say or do.